Back To School: Last Minute Tips

Around here schools starts in just a few short days.  When we were at Trader Joes earlier today, it looked like Friday rush-hour with all the moms and kids doing last minute lunch shopping.  Granola bars, cheese sticks, and little packets of hummus were promenently displayed, and I saw more than one child trying to negotiate their own version of a tasty lunch.  How ever you decide to meet this challenge, here are a few last tips for making the transition from summer to school a huge success:

- Lay EVERYTHING out the night before (clothes, hair and teeth items, lunch supplies, keys, etc)
-No screens (that means no tv, computers, phones, or music players they only waste time)
-Shower the night before (I know this is hard, but showering is such a massive time sink)
-Go to sleep a little earlier every day for a week (you too Mom and Dad!)
-Practice the route (drive or walk to school and/or the bus stop so you know timing)
-Remind kids that school is a welcoming place full of exciting opportunities

Potty Business

The Baby is getting to an age when we are starting to think about considering talking about the possibility of going potty.  I DO NOT want to make the same mistake as my aunt who made such a fuss over the whole thing that her son stopped going altogether rather than deal with the pressure.  I want it to be easy and low-stress at all times.  I've watched one brother, three cousins, two niecs, and six nanny charges learn to use the bathroom, so I know what a challenge it can be.  I'm hoping we can get things to go off smoothly for our little girl.

Dr. Spock started writing about potty business in the 1930's!  At that time he was countering the militaristic approach where children were strapped to potties at a very early age, and then smacked if they had an accident.  He said that children should, instead, be allowed to play with a potty for several weeks before you even introduce the idea that it can have another function.  Then, he recommends just casually mentioning that potties are places where we can do our business too.  I know he's old school now, but it just seems like common sense to me.  The no pressure approach may well backfire on me, but I'm going to give it a shot. 

Vegetarian Back-to-School Lunches

I know, I know, you're starting to sweat.  Your kid is due to head back to class in only a few short days and that means lunches.  Lots and lots of lunches.  If your kid complains that they can't look another PBJ in the face again, then you have come to the right place.  Having worked as a teacher for a decade, I know a thing or two about what to pack and how to keep things healthy and interesting.  When you are a vegetarian (or have one as a son or daughter), there usually aren't that many choices in the lunchroom (who wants their kid to eat that stuff anyway?), so you might as well get to be friends with the good old lunchbox.  First, the basics.  These are the pantry items you might want to consider.  Of course you must read labels to determine which ones are healthy and which ones are schlock:

Category #1: Grains (mostly anyway)

-whole grain crackers
-graham crackers
-pretzel sticks
-muffins
-rice cakes
-rice balls
-cooked grains such as quinoa or barley
-tortillas
-pasta salad
-granola bars
-banana bread, zucchini bread, or pumpkin bread
-bagel chips
-dry cereal
-bagels
-pita bread

Category #2: Proteins (though to be fair, many of the above have protein too)
-cheese (Babybell and stringcheese are great, but be creative!)
-vegetarian deli slices (I like the ones from Turtle Island Foods)
-beans (so many kinds and so many ways to prepare them)
-nut butters (almond, sunflower, cashew)
-tofu (baked, broiled, fried!)
-eggs
-yogurt
-cottage cheese
-cream cheese
-hummus
-avocado

Category #3: Veggies
-peas (in shell or out)
-carrots
-celery
-cucumbers
-bell peppers
-tomatoes (I know, technically a fruit!)
-broccoli (steamed?)
-cauliflower (steamed?)
-greenbeans (steamed?)
-corn

Category #4: Fruit
-berries (mmmm!)
-cherries
-grapes
-oranges (get easy to peel for little kids)
-melons
-pineapple
-apples (only when other things aren't in season)
-applesauce (I use the tubs as an emergency back-up item)

Of course you are not going to buy all of these items at one time, but it does give a person ideas.  Just mix and match these ingredients to keep things fresh and interesting.  You do not have to make a four course dinner to satisfy your hungry child, just give them good quality items, and be sure to take their tastes into account as well.  Getting their input and participation will dramatically increase the percentage of lunches actually consumed.  Do not fear the box!


 

Cool Suppers

Yet another link from Chow!  I know I link to them all the time, but they have such yummy-looking recipes that I can't resist.  This collection is all about making dinner on a very hot evening when you don't even want to look at the stove.  That cucumber and grape soup looks especially tasty. 

A Mooooooving Experience

The other evening we were all coming back from a hike, and so we were tired, hungry, and more than a little grubby. Our route took us past the local Hindu temple, and I noticed they had a huge inflatable cow set up right next to the street. Drawing the baby's attention to it, she was looking up just as we passed by. That thing must be two stories tall. The look on her face was first fear, then amazement, and finally excitement. Then she frantically tried to figure out which baby signs would mean "bring back the huge inflatable cow."

Back-to-School Wardrobe: You

Many women, myself included, would far rather dress the kid than have anything to do with their own clothes.  Nevertheless, we must attend to ourselves lest our kids and husbands be ashamed to be seen with us.  Besides, even mommies deserve a little sprucing up!  If you can, go shopping without the kids (first day they're back in school?) and try to enjoy the experience.  You don't have to spend tons of money to freshen up your closet.  I am BY NO MEANS a fashion maven, but there are a few trends that I've noticed in my magazines and on the web:

1. Flowy, blousy tops  (As long as they aren't too over the top, this can be very wearable)
2. Velvet! (Woohoo!)
3. Menswear (Tux jackets are for dressier times, but anybody can appreciate an oxford)
4. Peplums (This is the cute shaping to jackets and shirts that gives you a great shape if done right)
5. Cargo (pants or skirts, but with less volume than before)
6. Lace (be careful this can go to far so easily)
7. High-waist, wide-leg pants (I know, I know, but times change.  Just get the pair that fits)
8. Skinny jeans (I know, I know I hate them too!)
9.  Leather (When does this ever go out?)
10. Stripes! (Think more French and less Nautical unless you live on the shore and have a yacht)

Please, please, please don't buy or wear any of those nasty furry vests from last year.  It was a bad idea then, and it is an even worse idea now.  Maybe you can save it and turn it into a bear costume for Halloween.

Waving Bye-Bye

Being nearly eighteen months old means that the baby is very nearly grown up (or so she claims), and that equates to doing many more things on her own. She wants to feed herself no matter how messy she gets, she wants to climb into the chair by herself no matter how many bumps this may entail, and she wants to make her own choices about all sorts of things. The problem is how to express yourself when your vocabulary is all of maybe twenty words. This is where you have to get creative.


Getting people to do what you want is always though. Often she uses the sign for "more" to mean "do this service for me." For instance, she uses that sign when she wants you to open the door, lift her up, open something, or even take her around the hippie fair so she can listen to more music. The problem comes from not knowing which service or item she wants at a given time. I spend a lot of time saying "do you want x?" then she will shake her head "do you want y?" and so on. At least she knows specific signs for books and hungry, so those most important topics are covered.

Then there's also the problem of saying when she doesn't like something. The "all done" sign works for some things, such as finishing food, but it doesn't really cover everything. After quite a bit of frustration she's settled on waving bye-bye when she wants something to be over. Thus she will listen to music in the car and then wave "bye-bye" when she wants me to change the song. It's quite the sign that she's never waved at Mr. Darby or Caspar Babypants. She waves at things that are scary or boring or just not her style. I'm guessing that as she gets older, the opinions will only get more strident.

Back to School Wardrobe: Kids

Back-to-school shopping is obviously something I did as a child, but I've also been on the adult end of things too.  When I was in college, I was a nanny for a family with three kids.  The parents were extremely busy with work and hobbies, so I did a lot of the jobs that you might not expect.  I took the kids to most of their doctor and dentist appointments.  I did sports practices, monitored homework, and sometimes even met with teachers.  Often I was also called upon to take the kids shopping.  If they needed something, it was much easier for us to run out after school than for the parents to try to find time in their very busy weekends.  As a result, I did more than one back-to-school shopping trip. 

One of my magazines says that this is the perfect time to start over with kids' clothes.  Just throw away the ratty undies and socks, and donate everything else to charity.  Now buy everything new!  I won't name the rag because I think this is a terrible idea.  Not only is it wasteful, but you run the risk of mutiny.  My three charges would have been most offended if I'd just tossed some much-loved clothes.  "Pruning" is an important activity, but be sure you don't get rid of anything precious to the child or they might try to go to school naked in protest.  How much you actually buy depends a lot on how much useable stuff you already have, but use this list as a general rule of thumb:

-Socks (14 pairs in cotton.  Avoid synthetics since they make most people sweat)
-Undies (10-14 pairs. Get different styles or colors for each kid or the wash will be confusing)
-Shirts (5 in 100% cotton.  Short sleeves make a great base layer)
-Pants (3-4 pairs in sturdy material.  Leggings are fine for girls, but watch the school rules on these)
-Shorts (hopefully you still have these from summer, but if not...)
-Skirts (1-2 if she likes them, but be careful that she's always able to run and play comfortably)
-Sweatshirts (2-3 in different colors and styles)
-Coats (1 for cold and 1 for rain)
-Shoes (1 pair of athletic and 1 pair of dressier, but still comfortable, ones)

Old Navy and Target are great places to buy new items, but consignment shops are really a wonderful option.  Using the weekend ads in the paper, I estimate that this shopping list could easily cost more than $300 for just one child!  If one only buys the shoes and underthings new, and gets the rest at the resale shop, the total price could come down to as little as $100.  That's still a lot of money, but much easier to swallow in the family budget.  If you can, spreading out the purchases is another great way to go.  Wait to buy the coats, for instance, until the cold weather is actually about to happen.  This way, you and your child will feel good about the way they look on the first day of school.

Basic Back-to-School Supply List

It's that time once again!  Moms are starting to get edgy, teachers are running around like mad, and kids are mostly just plain old excited.  The time to think about autumn and school has arrived at last.  I always hate to see summer go, but once I accept the change, I love fall too.  If you have not already done your back-to-school shopping, now is the time to start.  If your child's teacher doesn't publish a list in advance, you can go with the basics and fill in the gaps once she gets to school.  Here's a basic supply list:

-Glue sticks (buy several, and don't skimp here, the cheap ones are a pain)

-Colored pencils
-No. 2 pencils (Yes you really do need these NOT MECHANICAL. Only these work on tests.)
-Scissors (Be sure these are age appropriate, and tie ribbon on a handle to mark them)
-Crayons for elementary kids
-Ballpoint pens (washable please)
-A pencil sharpener (hand-held with a top to collect shavings)
-A big pink eraser (Again, mark these with your child's name)
-Small pencil cap erasers (extend the life of the pencil)
-Washable markers (broad tip for little ones, and fine or extra fine for older kids)
-Classic white glue
-Spiral-bound (with micro-perf pages)
-A three-ring binder and plenty of binder paper

Add to that a large, comfortable backpack (say "no" to messenger bags which are bad for young backs) and a functional lunch bag, and your child will be all set for the big day.  Okay, I guess there's still the question of clothes to deal with, but that's another post.

Family Calendar

I'm trying out a new family calendar website called Cozi.  It seems like a fairly slick little bunch of tools for managing that hugely busy family schedule so many of us seem to have.  Even with just one small kid, I often fear forgetting our commitments.  The calendar part is fairly simple.  It's sort of like google calendar in that you can share between all members of the family.  Shopping lists and task lists are available too which is nice for those moments when you wish could remember why you went into the store in the first place.  I like the little journal too, though I know my husband will make fun when he notices.

Thus far the only downside I can see is that they don't have an app to let you view the calendar for the windows phone.  Let's remember that no everyone's brain has been colonized by Apple!  Then again, that's another story. 

The Very First Funny

Last Sunday, The Baby and I were hanging out together as we are wont to do in the early hours just after she wakes up. She drinks milk. I drink tea and milk. She plays with her babies and stuffed toys. I "play" with the dishwasher and the broom. She builds with blocks. I build breakfast. She reads picture books. I read the internet or the paper. It's a highly satisfactory arrangement.


Only sometimes, more and more in fact, she wants to do what I'm doing. Not just something near me, but exactly what I am doing. This morning it was reading the paper. I tried to get her interested in other activities, but she would not be denied. Then I remembered the comics. Sure enough, I dug them out, and she was very happy to sit on my lap and admire the children and pets sprinkled among the pages.

Then we came to "Red and Rover" where a dog was filling a swimming pool with beach balls. Then she laughed. Because that dog with the beach balls was just SO funny it made her laugh. Which is a totally everyday event except that it was probably the first time she's ever laughed at a comic. I hope that was the first out of maybe 10,000 or 20,000 times she will get to laugh at the comics.

Over-Booked Kids

Here is a fascinating article about the over-scheduling of children in modern parenting.  It's certainly the fashion to sign your children up for every type of sports, music, arts, and drama activity, but are all these fabulous "opportunities" really beneficial?  Steven Levitt says no.  As far as econonomists can tell, there is no correlation between the number of activities and the later success of the child.  The article also suggests that perhaps parents frantic scheduling is really about trying to find your child's hidden talent so that you will have a clear marker of your parenting success. 

The Discipline Debate

I recently overheard a conversation in which a mother of a maybe one year old baby described her attempts at discipline.  The child is not even walking yet, but she was concerned that she nip problems "in the bud" before it became a major concern.  It seems that her baby has been doing all sorts of very troubling things such as throwing food on the ground, wiggling while being dressed, and trying to pull things of table tops.  Shocking I know!  Did you ever meet a baby who did such aweful things?!  It gets worse.

At a loss for how to stop her, she talked to her sister who suggested smacking.  Yes, smacks were proscribed to cure wiggling.  She tried smacking the next time she did something wrong, but she just laughed.  Then she decided that she needed to "study" how much force it would take for her to stop laughing.  Every time she did something naughty, she hit the baby a little bit harder until finally she seemed to "notice." At last, she got her baby to cry!  Success! 

I just cringed when I heard all this.  Whacking my child has never seemed like an option to me.  I spend so much time trying to avoiding her coming to harm that I can't imagine causing it on purpose.  I also don't think a one year old child is capable of understanding why they are being smacked.  Sure, they may learn that certain behaviors result in pain, but if they don't get why then it doesn't really work.  Maybe when my child is older I will feel the need to spank her, but she far it just seems barbaric to me. 

I really do believe that children model everything they see us do.  I know this because I've watched her "brush" her teeth, "read" magazines, and want to try every bit of food on our plates.  Why should we think that this one area, hitting, would be different?  If I use force and pain to get what I want in life, why shouldn't she do the same?

Tide Ad To-Do

It seems that many people are upset recently due to a new TV ad from Tide.  The ad, which features a pink clad mother complaining about her daughter's love of cargo shorts and hoodies, seems to be poking fun at children who do not follow traditional gender roles.  Now I'm sure Tide would say that they intended to poke fun at the mother's discomfort, but I'm not at all sure that's the way it appears.  For the last time, let's please lay off of kids who don't conform.  Pink and blue are not uniforms, and it is grossly unfair to suggest that they are.  Kids who stand up for their own sense of style (or self) often feel the brunt of society's discomfort with otherness.  We do not need TV commercials to make it worse. 

The Business of Being Born Review

Since my husband is away on a business trip, I've been watching all sorts of movies I would not normally be willing to inflict on him.  Romantic comedies and historical costume dramas are my usual fodder, but sometimes I throw in documentaries that I think might not be his taste.  Last night I happened upon one called The Business of Being Born about labor and delivery in the United States.  I'd seen a snippet of the movie on TV, and I thought it might be interesting.  It certainly is a subject that is close to my heart.

What a shock!  This was a piece that claimed to want educate people about the different choices available for women delivering babies.  However, all I found was a bunch of scare tactics designed to frighten, guilt, or just confuse women into one way of thinking.  One of the worst parts was the discussion of how women don't get the "real" bonding hormones if they don't have a "natural" delivery.  I guess I've just been fooling myself about my crazy love for my daughter.  I am not a fan of this movie, and I certainly don't entertain their perspective AT ALL as a result of watching. 

Art with Kids

When summer first arrives in the Pacific NW, all I want to do is be outside.  We walk, we play in the backyard, and we visit parks and playgrounds with our friends.  We generally just worship the sun since we don't see it so much around here.  However, as summer wears on, and it gets hotter, I start to want those occasional afternoons "off" from the heat and the glare.  This is why we found ourselves heading to the Bellevue Arts Museum on a recent Friday. 

The Seattle Art Museum has its free visitor day on the first Thursday of every month, but Bellevue prefers to offer Free Fridays.  Either one is fine with me.  Now you might think that an art mueum with a toddler is a crazy idea, and you could certainly tell, from the looks in the elevator, that's exactly what some other patrons thought.  Perhaps our baby is unusual, but she really seems to enjoy museums.  Think about it, there are many things to look at and lots of them are huge and/or colorful.  What's not to like?  I think she was a bigger fan of all that modern art than I actually. 

We all like the Michael Cooper sculptures in wood and metal that made us think of bicycles meet Da Vinci machines.  Only the little one enjoyed the modern jewelry, and I think that was only because of the life-size banana necklace.  The baby was also the biggest fan of Midway by Cathy McClure because she liked the elephants.  The big people found the strobe to be nauseating within about three seconds.  All through the museum we saw sculptures by Wanxin Zheng.  These were declared "interesting" by the grown-ups and "fascinating" by the small fry. 

On the whole, we enjoyed our trip to the art museum.  I would go back depending on what the new exhibits might arrive.  Don't worry about taking kids to places like this.  They are people who are capable of enjoying culture too.  Museums should not be hallowed places where only snooty, silent people are allowed to go and say things like "ah yes, I enjoy how he frames the negative space with that blob of engine oil!"

BIG Teeth

Quick update: molars! Well one anyway. It was not exactly an easy time cutting this tooth, and she had a lump the size of a pea for several days, but finally it is through at last. Now perhaps the drool will let up, and cheerfulness will return.  What they say abou the first tooth and the molars being the hardest seems to be entirely true. We're up to nine teeth with the addition of that one, and one day soon the baby will have grinding skills. Nuts, raw food, and other tough things here we come!

Keeping Cool

While the Pacific Northwest is finally enjoying it's first sustained blast of summer warmth, much of the country has been enduring a heat-wave for some time now.  Temperatures well over 100 f. have appeared all over parts of the SW, SE, and all along the Eastern Seaboard.  While air-conditioners are great in this sort of heat, not everybody has them, and not everyone can afford to run them constantly.  When I was first working after college, I lived in an old house with no air-conditioning at all.  My room was at the top, right under the eaves, and you can just imagine how it sweltered on sticky summer nights.  Here are a few tips, then, on the art of keeping cool:

1.  Keep hot air out during the day by closing windows and getting heavy, dark, or even thermal curtains
2. As soon as the outside temp drops below the inside, draw curtains, open windows, and set up a fan
3. If you only have one fan, point it out, so it will suck the hot air away
4. If you have two windows and two fans, create a cross-breeze with one pointing in and one out
5. Turn off all heat sources such as electronics, appliances, and adjust pilot lights (if possible) to low
6. Speaking of appliances DO NOT COOK!  Use the microwave if you really must
7. Dry laundry on a line if you can as the dryer is a huge source of heat
8. Hand wash and dry dishes too
9. Strip!  If you're in the shade or indoors wear as little as possible (ooo the possibilities!)
10 If you're outdoors keep covered with light-colored, natural fiber clothes
11.Pretent you're in a spa and put cucumber slices over your eyes.  The astringent really helps
12. Go down in the basement (or lowest level) and lay on the slab
13 Fill a glass with ice, and blow down into it.  The air the comes back up will be deliciously chilled
14. Draw a lukewarm bath, get in, wait five minutes, drain the bath, and then run cold water
15. Ask the kids to move over, and get in their pool too!
16. Stick to water for refreshment, studies show that sugary drinks just make you thirstier in the end
17. Speaking of water: drink lots! A little lemon and/or some fresh herbs make it more appealing
18. Some people say the back of your neck is your body's thermostat.  Try an icecube or wet towel
19. Set up a plastic lawn chair under the sprinkler and enjoy the blast
20.  When all else fails, go to the movies!

How Clean is Your Local Playplace?

My daughter is a little young to enjoy indoor play areas in restaurants, but millions of kids visit them every day.  I'd heard that they were a place where children often pick up colds, but I didn't think they were any worse than a playground.  How wrong I was.  This article is all about the truly horrible things lurking in these play yards, how rarely most of them get cleaned, and they are actually dirtier than other public places.  I do not think our girl will be allowed to visit any time soon!

Even Awesome Teachers Need Help

I have to thank my friend, C., for sending me a link to this article.  It's all about how the current "magic bullet" in education is the idea that there are superstar teachers who will fix everything.  Everything she writes about her experience with that was true for me as well.  The only part I would disagree on is the idea that wealthier schools somehow escape the problem of over-crowding. 

I would also like to mention the one part of the education equation that is simply never mentioned in the discussion:  parenting.  You would not believe some of the parenting failures I've seen over the years, but nothing is done or said about it becuase that is a difficult and painful topic.  Therefore we just leave it alone entirely.  News flash politicians!  If a child's life is falling apart at home, they do not care how stellar I am in the classroom each day.  At that point all I can do is damage control. 

Discovery of Witches Book Review

I'm guessing this is what happened: the author of Discovery read the Twilight books, looked at how popular they are, and said to herself "I can do this better and for grown-ups."  And that's just what she did.  Well, maybe not the "better" part.  This book is a romance featuring a vampire and a mortal girl who also happens to be a powerful, if latent, witch.  This author used her personal expertise in history, mythology, yoga, and wine appreciation (nope I'm not kidding) to flesh out the story.  The results are lush and interesting half the time, then forced and even embarrassing at other turns. 

I loved the idea that a vampire would have seen so much history and have connections in so many places.  I did not love the lame romantic moments (just skip those pages unless you have strong appreciation of cheese) or the parts where she goes rowing or to yoga again and again.  I'm not sure if this was a good book in need of a better editor, or a bad book in need of a re-write.  No, no, calling it bad is not fair.  I did like the book, and I am not sorry I read it.  I just think it shows that this is her first work of fiction.  Perhaps the follow up will be stronger, and perhaps they will find her a very experienced and opinionated editor.